


Stay With Me

by itwasmeanttobe



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: M/M, Mumbai!AU, Prostitute!Zayn, Smoking, This is the first time i'm writing so bear with me, but there's a happy ending, it's a little sad towards the end, poor!Zayn, rich!liam
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-04-04
Updated: 2015-08-08
Packaged: 2018-03-21 05:11:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 12,237
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3678951
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/itwasmeanttobe/pseuds/itwasmeanttobe
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After checking almost a dozen sites, he stumbled upon one that made his forehead crease and his fingers stop. It read-</p><p>  <i> You could always try your hand at being an escort. It's good money and more times than not, also a good lay. Be careful with who you choose. It gets your Rs. 500 minimum if you’re average looking. It could be more if you’re pleasing to the eye.  </i></p><p>Still halted in his tracks, Zayn analysed what he had just read. <i>Escorts, sex, strangers, nights, money, money that he needed.</i></p><p> </p><p>Or, </p><p> </p><p>Far away from the western parts of the world, in a city called Mumbai, Liam hires an escort and his life will never be the same.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. When He Met Him

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first time I'm writing a Ziam fic. So, of course, I'm shit scared.
> 
> Anyway, this idea popped into my head a few months ago and after a lot of internal struggle I began writing it. I'm aware that it's not perfect and I'd really appreciate it if you could point out, albeit kindly, any grammatical or spelling errors that you come across. I would be forever indebted. 
> 
> It's not the best fic out there. It doesn't even come close to all the fics I've read till date. I'm sorry if you're left disappointed. Irrespective of what you think after you read it, please take time to comment and tell me what you feel.
> 
> _Title taken from Sam Smith's song of the same name_  
>     
> Thanks a ton. You're beautiful and I love you. _Live long and prosper!_

####  ** Chapter 1: When He Met Him  ******

***

**Mumbai; Saturday, 25th October 2014; 19:32 pm**

Aye dil hai mushkil jeena yaha  
Zara hat ke, zara bach ke,  
Yeh he Bombay meri jaan. 

Mumbai - A city that has hypnotised every soul that has ever had a taste of it. Writers have had lifelong affairs with her; artists have called her their muse. Thriving with life, bubbling with excitement, Mumbai is not a noun, it’s a verb. People who think they have no prospects and no future find reason in Mumbai. Reason to live. 

With this goal in mind, Zayn has moved to Mumbai almost two months ago. When he first reached the metropolitan city, he was lost in the sea of people. The dozens of shops and never ending flea markets had mesmerised him. Mumbai was not much different from Delhi, where he had been born. But, he felt suffocated in Delhi. Tied to millions of traditions and expectations that he had to live up to. 

But, Mumbai made him feel alive. Alive in a way that he had never felt earlier in his family home. Mumbai gave him a chance. To be himself and not care about others’ opinions. To do as he liked and not worry about what Mr. Khan, his neighbour, thought about his choices. And he wouldn’t have it any other way.

**~**

_Zayn remembers the look of absolute pride on his Abba’s face when he told him that he’d stood first in his college._

 _When Zayn had said 94.8%, his Abba had been left speechless._

 _

Zayn had been ecstatic. But, his Abba had hugged him and said, “Saabash, mere bete. You have made me proud.” 

At that time, Zayn was certain that he was the happiest boy on earth. 

But, then his father had said, “So, you’ll become an engineer?” 

Now, Zayn was left speechless.

_

**~**

_Ever since Zayn had been a 5 year old boy, he’d had a penchant for the teaching occupation._

 _He’d watch his teachers stand in front of the class, read from textbooks and write on blackboards with white chalk. He’d stare in amazement when his teachers would sometimes sit in class and grade papers with a red pen and slight frowns on their faces. He’d look at his teachers talk to a student’s parents and make them aware of their child’s progress. He’d see his teachers and imagine himself in their place._

 _

The act of planting seeds of knowledge in a child’s mind was the most charismatic experience he’d ever heard of. He wanted to teach. He wanted to change the world one child at a time. He wanted to make the world a better place. 

But, his Abba had different plans. 

His Abba wanted him to become an engineer. Study in a top-shot university. Graduate at top of the class. Get a job at some multi-national company. Earn a fat pay check. Get married to some Muslim girl. And have kids. 

He couldn’t do that. Firstly, because Zayn wanted to be a teacher and secondly, because he was into guys. Not that he would ever tell his Abba about his sexuality. 

But, he sure as hell told him about wanting to be a teacher. 

Boys don’t teach, his Abba had said. 

So, Zayn fought with him. There were raised voices, unshed tears (Because Zayn’s Abba had always taught him that men didn’t cry), broken hearts and shattered hopes. 

Ultimately, Zayn and his Abba arrived at a compromise. 

Zayn would study at the University of Delhi. He would major in Mechanical Engineering but minor in Teaching. 

Zayn was 17 at that time. 

_

**~**

_Four years had passed. Zayn was now 21._

 _He had finished his degree. His Abba placed two options in front of him._

 _

Either Zayn could apply for a job (as an engineer, of course) or do an MBA. 

Zayn chose the latter. 

_

**~**

_Two years had passed. Zayn was now 23._

 _He had three degrees to his name – Major In Mechanical Engineering, Minor In Teaching and an MBA. He could now get any job he wanted. He could go to The States, London, China, wherever he wanted. He could work for a multi-national company or for a bank of international repute. (His Abba wanted him to work for JP Morgan Chase & Co.) _

_

But, you see, old habits die hard. 

Zayn still wanted to teach. 

So Zayn did something he should have done six years ago. 

He ran away. 

_

**~**

_Before Zayn left, he wrote his Aaba a letter._

 _Dear Abba,_

 _

I once knew a boy 

Who wanted to fly 

He wanted to cross oceans 

With his wings 

And conquer the world 

With his flight 

But, Others told him 

It wasn’t possible 

Others told him 

It wasn’t acceptable 

So, he walked the way they asked him to walk, 

And talked the way they suggested. 

He was a puppet, 

Wrapped around their fingers. 

But, 

One day it all changed, 

One day it just snapped, 

One day he said ‘No’ 

One day, 

He took those broken wings 

And learned to fly. 

_

**~**

_Zayn left Delhi._

 _And moved to Mumbai._

**~**

As he sat by the window of his rundown flat in the southern parts of Mumbai, he heard the door to his flat open. His landlady marched in, anger in eyes, annoyance in her stance. 

The 60-something, Catholic woman asked Zayn, “Baba, tumne bola tha um paisa kal doge. What happened to my money?” 

Zayn had paid rent for the first months with whatever little money he had brought along with him from Delhi. But, after spending money on food and some basic furniture, he had nothing left. He’d gotten a job as a substitute teacher but his salary was due only on 1st November. 

On telling her his plight she said, “You get me my money by tomorrow evening, young man, or I will chase you out of this house. And, you will be left to live on the streets.” 

He mumbled an ‘okay’ and led her out of the house. 

His nervousness reduced but his frown remained. He tried to think of ways to get almost 1000 rupees within 24 hours but, nothing came to his mind. Desperate to get the money, he thought of going to the cyber cafe around the corner to google quick ways to earn a few bucks. 

As he walked down the building looking at unknown faces, he realised that he didn’t really know anyone in this huge city. He was just another face in this sea of billions. He was a drop of water in an endless ocean, a grain of sand in a never-ending desert. His only companions were his paintbrushes, those charcoal pencils he’d purchased from Crawford market, that copy of ‘The Stranger In The Mirror’ that he’d reread so many times that he’s lost count, each pack of Marlboro Reds that he’d ever bought and endless bottles of cheap vodka that he drank like it was water. 

Not wanting to stress his brain too much, he extracted himself from his thoughts and walked faster. Upon entering the cyber cafe, he reluctantly paid the owner 30 rupees to use the internet for half an hour. 

Choosing a seat near the corner, he sat down and opened Google. He typed in _‘Quick ways to earn money in Mumbai’._ Clicking on the first site that he saw, he began reading, lip caught between his teeth. 

Most of the sites suggested jobs like opening daycares, blogging, renting out spaces for parking, writing e-books, starting pawn shops, etc. But, none of them were fast enough for Zayn. 

After checking almost a dozen sites, he stumbled upon one that made his forehead crease and his fingers stop. It read- 

_You could always try your hand at being an escort. Its good money and more times than not, also a good lay. Be careful with who you choose. It gets your Rs. 500 minimum if you’re average looking. It could be more if you’re pleasing to the eye._

Still halted in his tracks, he analysed what he had just read. _Escorts, sex, strangers, nights, money, money that he needed._

Zayn closed the tab and walked out of the shop. Little did he know that his life would change forever.

***

**London; Sunday, 26th October, 2014; 09:17 am**

Liam woke up. His shoulders ached and he had a horrible headache. 

After a night of teasing and tempting at the club a few streets away from his house, Aiden and he had stumbled home and immediately started undressing each other. 

_Aiden pushed Liam against the door and started lifting his shirt above his head. After the shirt was off, he begun sucking a mark on Liam’s neck. It hurt a bit but Liam didn’t complain._

 _It had always been like this with them. No long kisses, no lingering touches. Just painful hickeys and rough fucking. And Liam knew that this was exactly what was going to happen tonight. Because just like Christian Grey, Aiden didn’t make love. He fucked. Hard. And although it was sometimes uncomfortable, Liam loved it._

 _

Not giving Liam time to react, Aiden dropped him to his feet and unbuttoned his own jeans. As Aiden went to grab the bottle of lube, Liam stood there for a while, staring at his body and that glorious arse. When he returned, seeing that Liam was still dressed, he said, “You gonna stay there all night? Remove your damn jeans, Liam!” 

A shiver went south through his body and Liam quickly obeyed. Dominating Aiden was not to be messed with. Knowing what was coming next, Liam went down on his knees. Aiden stepped out of his jeans and put a hand over his throbbing uncut cock. He walked towards the door and leaned against it. Liam, on his knees, moved towards Aiden. Or Aiden’s cock. 

Not skipping a beat, Liam licked the head a few times. Then he wrapped his lips around it and began sucking. As he did what he had already done a thousand times over, he looked up at Aiden. He was staring down at Liam with hooded eyes. Liam made obscene noises as he continued to suck Aiden for all he was worth. Like his life depended on it. Fast enough, he had almost the whole length in his mouth. Tears oozed out of his eyes and he was doing his best to refrain from gagging. 

He let go to draw in a breath and licked a strip on the underside. He focused specially on the underside because he knew that this drove Aiden absolutely nuts with carnal desire. 

Again, he swallowed the whole length. But, this time with relatively little difficulty. Aiden realised that Liam was pretty comfortable and he began fucking Liam’s mouth. With one hand holding the bottle of lube, he gripped 

Liam’s hair and guided his mouth on his cock just the way he liked it. He drew out only to enter again. 

Liam moaned as Aiden grunted. The slurping noises were exceedingly loud in the quite flat and Aiden’s body shook as he made Liam swallow his entire length. The throbbing knob hit the back of Liam’s throat. Aiden was now passionately fucking Liam’s mouth. After a few more minutes, Aiden let Liam take control. Gladly accepting the opportunity, Liam dragged a little bit of his teeth on Aiden’s erection. Judging by the moan that Aiden let out, he surely enjoyed this. 

“Liam. Fuck. Fuck, I’m gonna come. Get off. Fu-fuck.” 

Obeying Aiden, Liam let go of Aiden’s length with one last lick and got to his feet. Aiden grabbed his hips and turned them around so that Liam’s back was to the door and he was facing Aiden. Opening the bottle of lube, he slicked his fingers to lubricate them. Then, he dropped the bottle and effortlessly lifted Liam off the ground. Liam automatically wrapped his legs around Aiden’s back. 

Aiden inserted one finger into Liam’s quivering hole as Liam cried out in pleasure. 

“Fuck, Aiden!” 

He started moving the digit in Liam’s hole. Then he dragged it out and pushed in again. Liam’s moans amplified. 

“More, Aiden. Fuck. Fuck! Yes, y-yes. Add another.” 

Paying heed to Liam’s consistent demands, Aiden added another digit and began scissoring Liam’s hole. 

Within a few seconds, he brushed against Liam’s prostate. Liam moaned so loud that he was sure the neighbours had heard him. 

“Stop te-teasing! Fuck me! Fuck me, please. Pl-please.” 

Aiden wouldn’t budge. He said, while alternating thrusts with his fingers, “You were the one” thrust “who teased me, Liam, innit?” thrust “Fuck! So tight!” thrust “You fucking danced” hard thrust “with that Tomlinson bloke.” Another thrust “And don’t get me started on your flirting session with the bartender.” 

Liam gave him a sly smile as Aiden growled. His eyes were filled with jealously. But the jealousy was overpowered by lust and desire. 

“You aren’t getting my cock unless you apologize, Liam.” said Aiden. 

Liam pouted but relented. “Sorry, babe. You know it’s only you that I want.” 

“It better be.” growled Aiden. 

Finally giving in, Aiden removed his fingers and making Liam stand he said, “Bend over the couch.” Liam did as told and went over to the couch. He bended and positioned his arse high up in the air. 

Aiden moved towards him and grabbed hold of his hard, leaking cock. He guided it to Liam hole. 

“I’m goin’ to fill you up so good, babe. I’ll fuck you so hard you won’t be able to walk for days.” 

“Fuck! Yes, Aiden. Yes, please.” 

The head entered his hole and a hiss of pain left Liam’s mouth. Slowly, Aiden pushed his whole length into Liam’s stretched hole. Liam cried out at the intrusion. Aiden stayed still, unmoving, giving Liam time to adjust. Although Aiden liked to fuck hard and rough, he wasn’t a douche. 

“Move. Move, Aiden. Shit!” 

Aiden pulled out only to push in again. Liam let out a loud groan. Waves of pleasure overtook his body and governed all his senses. For a couple more minutes, Aiden continued to pull out completely and then bottom out. Liam was sure by the way Aiden gripped his hips that marks would be visible tomorrow. 

To intensify the pleasure, Liam started flexing his arse-muscles around Aiden’s pounding cock. Liam’s arse-cheeks were slightly hurting from the incessant slapping of Aiden’s groin. The noise of Liam groaning, Aiden grunting, accompanied by the sound of skin slapping against skin filled the silent flat. 

Aiden continued fucking Liam’s hole as Liam continued letting out moans of pleasure. Liam’s cock was hard and leaking precome. He was certain that he would come soon. Aiden was no better. 

“Fu-ck! I’m gonna come, Liam.” 

Aiden’s voice sounded broken and blissed out. Liam was sure that if he tried his hand at speaking right now, his voice would be equally gravely and rapsy. 

True to his word, Aiden came a few thrusts later. He shot jets of come into Liam’s hole. The feeling of Aiden’s come in his ass made Liam’s cock spasm and he, too, was coming soon after. As he felt his orgasm go through, Aiden pulled out. 

“That was amazing, Liam.” 

Liam nodded his agreement and followed Aiden into his bedroom, not bothering to pick up the stray pieces of clothing strewn across the floor. Aiden collapsed on the bed and Liam followed suit. They dragged the covers over their body and soon enough, Aiden’s snores could be heard resonating through the walls of the flat. 

_

As Liam looked back at last night, he realised that although he had enjoyed it, he was not thoroughly satisfied. He liked Aiden’s style of fucking. Yes. But, maybe at times he wanted those long kisses and lingering touches. 

He wanted kisses, not hickeys. He wanted red roses on Valentine’s Day, not a celebratory fuck in the kitchen. He wanted to wake up to breakfast in bed, not a quick fuck in the shower. 

Maybe, at times, he wanted to make love, not fuck. 

But, unlike Christian Grey, Aiden couldn’t change. Liam knew this. Making love was not his cup of tea. _Aiden preferred coffee – pun intended._ Snickering at his personal joke, Liam got up, stretched and made his way to the bathroom to shower. On a normal day, he would’ve dragged Aiden along and convinced him for some shower sex. But, today wasn’t normal. Liam was, kind of, having second thoughts. And, it wasn’t sudden. He’d been thinking about this for quite some time. Although, he’d never voiced his discomfort. 

Aiden had perfect timing, Liam thought, when he made his way to the kitchen just as Liam was plating up the eggs and bacon. Aiden’s hair was tousled and his chest was bare with the abs on display. Liam should’ve found this hot but, he didn’t. 

Not after that little thinking session that he’d had in the morning. 

***

**London; Friday, 28th November, 2014; 10: 23 am**

Liam had always known that Aiden wasn’t faithful to him. 

He knew for a fact, that Aiden was seeing some other girl. 

He’d come home with hickeys that Liam knew he hadn’t given him. His dick would sometimes smell of strawberries and flavoured lipstick or whatever it is that women put on their lips nowadays. His shirts would reek of perfume. Ladies perfume. 

Once, when Liam tried to question Aiden about it, Aiden stopped Liam mid-sentence and told him how Liam was the only one he slept with. How Liam was the most handsome guy he had seen. How he loved Liam’s eyes. 

Ha! Liam was sure that Aiden didn’t even know that colour of his eyes. 

Liam never said anything after that. 

Because Aiden was a good lay. 

And for people like Liam, that was all that should matter. 

_Liam_ who always stumbled on his words and whose cheeks were too chubby. _Liam_ whose cheeks crinkled so much that when he smiled, his eyes couldn’t be seen. _Liam_ who was bullied in high school and whose birthday party was not attended by anyone. 

But, when Liam had got out of work early and decided to head over to Aiden’s flat for a quick fuck, what he didn’t expect was the exceedingly cliché _‘guy fucking another girl’_ scene. 

Liam didn’t even yell. Or scream. He only sighed and retraced his steps back to the door. He didn’t slam the door on his way out or cuss as he walked down the hallway. Instead, he quietly closed the door, got out the building and drove back home. 

Once, he got home, he let it all out. 

But again, he didn’t wail or whine and throw vases and lamps. He was never the kind of boy to cry loudly. He was the silent sufferer. Who cried not to show the world but, to let go. He cried into the duvet on his bed for an amount of time that he no longer remembers. 

In the following week, he neither blasted post break up songs in his apartment nor called up sick to work. 

His apartment was silent as ever and he obediently got into his car and went to work. Because, he knew that he shouldn’t let his personal life and work mix together. He was a rather good employee that way. Perhaps that was the reason why his boss wanted him to be the head of a new project that the company was undertaking. 

There was only one catch. The project was in Mumbai, India, Asia. In a totally different part of the world. And, he was expected to fly out in another t days. It meant that he would have to spend Christmas and New Year away from his family. 

Rather short notice, but he accepted it. (After apologizing to his mother, that is.) 

He wanted to get away from it all. 

Away from Aiden. Away from London. 

***

**Mumbai; Friday, 5th December, 2015; 20:56 pm**

It’d been three days since Liam flew to Mumbai. 

Speaking of flying, 

The 9½ hour flight had been tiring as hell. To begin with, it had been delayed by an hour. The seats were not comfortable at all, even though, Liam travelled Business Class. The airhostess had dropped red wine on his shirt and then apologized profusely. He had been given a replacement shirt but after wearing it for some time, his arms had started itching. A man was sent to get Liam’s suitcase up but, this man, clumsy as fuck, dropped his suitcase somehow and God alone knows how, it opened and out came all his ironed shirts, well pressed pants, underwear which included a pair of Batman boxers, some condoms (He liked to be prepared, alright?) and a bottle of lube (cherry flavoured). He’d blushed like there was no tomorrow and while some people had snickered, others had given him weird looks all throughout the flight. He’d been mortified and had made sure to ask (read: request) his assistant, Melanie, to never book him a flight on that particular airline again as he now hated it with a vengeance. 

Driving his car on the highway, Liam looked back on that horrid flight. Let bygones be bygones, he thought as he took the last turn towards the house that the company had given to him. He was destined to stay in Mumbai for another 2 months. He was glad to be away from Aiden. He needed a break. Time to figure out what he liked and what he didn’t. 

And Mumbai was kind of nice. It was a drastic change from London. Although Mumbai was no less different, there was a change in the atmosphere. London was never-ending snow, old and worn out books and Starbucks coffee. Mumbai was fast paced music, street food that was so spicy that Liam’s tongue burned the first time he tasted it at the airport and people; lots and lots of people. 

In Mumbai, the days were governed by the office goers and their sagged shoulders, hunched backs and tired eyes. The nights were ruled by music played too loud, teenagers out on the streets, movie theatres playing latest Hindi and English movies and lit up streets. The city came alive at night, when people danced till their knees gave out and drank till they could no longer see straight. 

_Some dance to remember, some dance to forget._

He wanted to drink _his_ sorrows away. He wanted to dance till his knees gave out. He wanted to get absolutely shit-faced. 

Another thing he wanted to do was sleep with someone. Sleep with someone who wasn’t Aiden. Even if it was just for a night. Even if it was just a one night stand. He wanted to _make love_ to someone. 

Now, you’d say that Liam was just horny. But. He wanted to feel wanted for once in his life. Not flipped over, with his arse in the air, and fucked with wanton. He wanted to fulfil his libido. 

The ideal way would be to go to some gay bar (Are those even found it Mumbai? He wasn’t so sure) and pick some random guy up, take him home and give him the time of his life. But, you see, Liam was not very good with words. He stuttered and at times, couldn’t form proper sentences because he wasn’t confident of himself. All his life, he’d thought that his back dimples were weird, his smile was too wide, his fingers were nothing but bear paws and his cheeks crinkled too much. 

So, going out and getting a guy was no good. 

Maybe, he’d have to do what he did in London before he had met Aiden. It was the same as going to a bar and picking up some random bloke. Only difference was, while the bloke from the bar would sleep with him for free, this one had to be paid. 

***

**Mumbai; Friday, 5th December, 2015; 21:27 pm**

When Zayn had first slept with another man for money, he’d thought that it would be a one-time thing. He’d done it once, he wouldn’t do it again. 

But, he was wrong. 

His salary as a substitute teacher wasn’t enough to pay his bills. And, he couldn’t become a full time teacher because, for that line of work, a B.Ed degree was required: which he didn’t have. _Thanks, Abba,_ he thought, sardonically. 

Through the week, Zayn taught English to 7th graders. But, come Friday, and he underwent a transformation. 

_Does his makeup in his room,_

_Douse himself with cheap perfume._

As he put on his jacket and cheap cologne he’d picked up from a flea market, he looked at himself in the mirror. Zayn knew he was attractive. But, it wasn’t something he cared about. Every second person was good looking, it was nothing new. It wasn’t like he’d be the next James Dean. So, yeah. 

He stepped out of the house and began walking towards Laburnum Road. It was an old locality with buildings dating back to the British era. After 9, you could see men standing below trees, sometimes with cigarettes in hand, waiting for someone to take them home. 

Today was no different. 

Little did Zayn know, that in some time, it would be. 

***

**Mumbai; Friday, 5th December, 2014; 21:43 pm**

Liam drove to the street that the site on the internet (aptly named - QueerInMumbai) had spoken about. It was not very far from his house. Around a 15 minute drive. The street looked normal. Like any other street in the city. But, what set it apart were the men. 

If you looked close enough, you’d realise that they weren’t standing there only for the heck of it. The men were exceedingly aware of their surroundings. They stared at every car that drove across the road. They made conversation with drivers who stopped and rolled down their windows. The road smelled of cigarettes and cologne while the air carried a hint of weed. Some men were standing in groups while the others stood like lone rangers, dressed in attractive shirts and tight pants that showed off their....well, assets. 

He slowed down eventually. Some men caught his eye. There was one with curly hair who didn’t look Indian at all. On any other day, Liam would have gone for him. He looked kind of cute with the bouncy hair and lanky legs. But, Liam had had enough of Western blokes. He was in India and he wanted to sleep with someone Indian. What’s the use of going to an Italian restaurant and ordering a burger with some fries? 

As Liam drove further, he noticed a boy with hunched shoulders standing on the footpath. His legs were up on the wall and his jacket was protecting him from the slightly cold air. 

_He looked like a fucking Gucci model._

His hair was up in elegant quiff and Liam wanted to run his hands through it. He had slight stubble on his cheek and Liam wanted to feel it against his face as he sucked a mark on the boy’s neck. His lips were stretched across a cigarette and Liam wanted to see how they’d look stretched around his dick. His fingers looked long and bony and Liam wanted to feel them inside himself. Heck, he wanted to feel _his_ fingers inside the boy. His jeans were tight and Liam wanted nothing but to see him without any piece of clothing on. He was sure that the boy’s clothes would look amazing on his bedroom floor. 

Liam adjusted himself in his pants. He was (embarrassingly) sporting a semi. But, he couldn’t help it. The boy looked fucking hot from afar. And, the best part was – he looked nothing like Aiden. While Aiden was muscular, this boy was lanky. While Aiden was to-. Oh, forget it. 

Liam had decided. He wanted to take this boy home. He was the best he’d seen all night. None of the other men even came close to him. 

Liam stopped his car in front of the boy and took him in. He really, really wanted to sleep with him. But, this boy was way out of his league. His cheekbones were incredibly high while Liam’s couldn’t be seen at all. His eyelashes were exceedingly long while Liam’s eyelashes were, well, short. He looked effortlessly sexy while Liam always tried too much. And failed. 

Before he could continue comparing himself (average, moderate-looking) to the boy (Indian version of a Greek God), he heard the boy speak. 

“Hey, mate. You’ alright?” 

His voice was like honey. Smooth and caressing. Like, he could heal wounds with that voice. He could turn tears to smiles. 

“Yeah. Um.” _Stupid, stupid, I’m so stupid._

Not wanting to make a fool out of himself in front of the boy, he said, “Um-I wanted to like, you know, take you home. Like, if you don’t, um, mind, that is? If you do mind, it’s fine. I mean, I understand, like. Yeah.” 

The boy snickered and Liam felt that it was one of the best sounds in the world. 

His lips tilted up into a smirk and he said, “I’d like to ‘go home’ with you. Unlock the door. Let me get in.” 

Liam nodded dumbly and unlocked the car door. 

The boy got in and looked at Liam with the semblance of a smile. Liam thought that it was one of the best sights in the world. 

Ha. Best sound, best sight. Liam was _so_ gone for this boy. 

“So, you’re going to drive to a hotel. Or you’re going to actually ‘take me home’?” 

“Um. I’d like to, take you home. I mean, like, my house. If you don’t, um, mind, of course?” 

He looked at Liam and said, “No, I don’t.” 

“Good”, was all Liam could manage.


	2. When He Made Love

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Hey, lovelies!**
> 
> Firstly, before everything else, I'd like to thank every person who read this, hit the Kudos button, left a comment and/or bookmark-ed it. It means the world to me. So, thank you, really. I wish I could personally meet each and every one of you and give a nice, tight hug. 
> 
> Secondly, I'd like to clear something.  
> Originally, I had thought that, in the story Zayn would hail from Karachi (i.e. Pakistan) and then move to Mumbai. It was only later that important questions about his passport, visa and travelling fare, came to me. Contrary to many popular novels, moving to a different country is a tough and gruesome task. So, I took the liberty to change the story a bit. Now, in the story, Zayn hails from Delhi (the capital of India) and then moves to Mumbai. So, there's no mention of Pakistan. That's all! 
> 
> Thirdly, I hope and pray that you like the second chapter. I'm aware that I had said that it would be up earlier. But, i was a bit skeptical about it and needed some time. Sorry for the wait and you can go and read it now. I will stop ranting.
> 
> ~ Lots of love and Ziam,  
> Winona 
> 
> For Sulphur, the closest thing I have to a best friend 

***

**Mumbai; 6th December, 2014; 22:16 pm**

With shaking fingers, Liam opened his flat’s door wide for the boy. Assessing Liam’s gesture, he said, with a smirk, “Such a gentleman.” Liam blushed. 

“So, um, what’s your name?” 

“They call me Zayn” 

“ _Zayn_ ”, Liam said. “That’s a beautiful name.” 

Now, it was Zayn’s turn to redden. A light blush crept up on his cheek and he lowered his face. _His eyelashes_ were all Liam could think about. 

“What’s your name?” Zayn asked. 

“Yeah. Sorry. I’m Liam Payne.” he said, raising his hand to shake Zayn’s in greeting. 

Zayn smirked (again) and shook Liam’s hand with an amused glint in his eyes. _Beautiful, beautiful hazel eyes._

“Okay. So, you want to do it in the bedroom. Or are you the adventurous kind?” 

Liam looked up, wide eyed. _Well, wasn’t he forward?_

“Wow. Um, the bedroom’s fine.” 

“Cool. Lead the way.” 

Liam spared Zayn one last glance and started walking towards the bedroom. 

After switching on the lights, he turned to look at Zayn who was removing his jacket. Liam could do nothing but watch the way Zayn’s fingers worked with such precision that Liam was blown away. Zayn had worn a Lee Cooper shirt underneath, complete with the name written in the familiar script and UK’s flag. Liam couldn’t help but think of London. The snow that would soon be falling in sheets, tea that he would have made in his apartment, his mom who would have surely called up Liam to tell him to wear clothes that are warm enough, his old sweater he would use (read: reuse) even though it was old and the fabric had stretched too much. Bottom line, he missed London. In all it’s white glory. 

“Hey. You okay, Liam?” 

Zayn’s voice snapped him out of his thoughts. He nodded his head in affirmation and looked at Zayn. 

Which was a grave mistake. 

Because, Zayn was standing there in only his black boxers and Liam could see the bulge. _Holy Fuck._ Zayn had collarbones to die for and tattoos on his chest that made him look more desirable that he was. The contrast of the black ink on his skin was worth staring at. It was worth gaping at. Because, that was all Liam was doing right now. 

Right on his collarbone, Zayn had a word inked in English. Liam couldn’t decipher what it was due to the distance between them. Below the word, Liam saw a skull with crossbones. _He probably wanted to look intimidating_ , Liam thought. A little below the skull tattoo, he saw something inked in a foreign script. It looked like Arabic but Liam wasn’t so sure. Foreign languages were never his forte. But, this tattoo was overshadowed by a pair of wings that spanned the entire top part of his chest, right below his collarbones. Between the two wings, was a tattoo of lips. Red, luscious lips. Somehow, this made Liam question Zayn’s sexuality. Not that he would ever ask Zayn because he was sure that it wasn’t his place. Zayn was only here for the night and Liam wouldn’t meet him again, possibly. This thought made Liam a little sad, surprisingly. 

As Liam continued gaping at Zayn’s chest, he saw the other skull tattoo next to the wings. This one was a bit funny. The skull wore a hat and a cigarette was dangling from his...well, the place where his lips would have been. Above the skull, was another transcription in Arabic. This one was comparatively longer. 

“You think a lot, don’t you?” Zayn asked, with that same smirk of his. 

“Um” was all Liam could muster. 

“Fine, I’ll lead the way.” 

Without waiting for Liam’s reply, Zayn walked over and stopped right in front of him. Liam could _feel_ Zayn’s breath on his face which tasted like cigarette smoke. He could _smell_ his cologne which had hints of an Indian scent, oranges and marjoram or whatever it was called, Liam thought. It smelled spicy and so irresistible. 

If Liam had thought Zayn looked hot from afar, he looked _beautiful_ this close. Liam’s tongue unconsciously slipped out to wipe a stripe of saliva across his lower lip. Before Liam could realise that Zayn had parted his lips at that action, Zayn was moving forward and crushing their lips together. 

It was almost painful due to the intensity with which their lips collided but the pain only intensified the pleasure. 

Fuck. This was better than he thought it’d be. 

Liam carded his fingers through Zayn’s hair and titled his head for better access. Hesitantly, he flicked his tongue out to lightly it run over Zayn’s bottom lip. Zayn audibly gasped and this fuelled the burning passion in Liam’s body. His tongue darted out again, this time with much more confidence and determination, to lick into Zayn’s mouth. Judging by the moan that Zayn let out, he surely enjoyed this. Liam pried Zayn’s mouth open and their tongues danced around each other in the caverns of their mouths. They fought for dominance but, ultimately, Zayn handed over the reins to Liam who taking control, licked into Zayn’s mouth. 

They kissed like they invented it. 

Liam tasted the remnants of Zayn’s cigarette and only wanted more. _More, more and more_. With this thought in mind, Liam’s hands found its way to Zayn’s waist and with slight pressure he made Zayn walk backwards towards the bed. 

Still kissing, Liam pushed Zayn onto the bed, albeit without much force. Zayn lifted his feet so that the soles of his feet were touching the bed but, the rest of his legs weren’t. Liam took a moment to truly gaze at the beauty of this boy spread out before him. His cock was painfully hard in his pants and he had only kissed Zayn. Zayn looked at Liam through hooded eyes, blissed out but impatient. He couldn’t wait to ravish Zayn and taste him in every way humanly possible. Probably, even beyond that. 

There was only one problem though. 

Zayn still had his damn _boxers_ on. 

Liam unbuttoned his shirt as quickly as possible and climbed on top of Zayn. Careful not to crush him under his weight, he lifted himself up on his elbows and dropped a chaste kiss to Zayn’s lips before moving downwards. He kissed Zayn’s chin and moved south towards his neck. Zayn moaned as Liam pressed kisses on his the vast expanse of his skin. Zayn’s skin was beautiful. Flawless and without a single blemish. He simply couldn’t believe that Zayn was his for the night. But, on other nights, he belonged to other men. Other men who kissed him, who tasted him, who praised him, who made him moan. Other men who made love to him. Liam shuddered and a possessive streak overtook his senses. He wanted to be different from those men. He wanted Zayn to remember him. He wanted to change Zayn’s life in his own way. He wanted to be missed. He wanted to leave his mark. So, he attached his lips to the spot right below Zayn’s ear and began sucking a mark there. He pulled the skin into his mouth and tried his best to not cause Zayn any sort of pain. After some time, he let go. He was sure that the skin would soon redden and the hickey would appear. His mark on one of the most beautiful boys he had ever encountered. 

Zayn was very vocal, always moaning and encouraging Liam. Liam loved this. He needed response to keep him going. He kissed further down Zayn’s body. He licked a stripe on Zayn’s wings tattoo and when he saw the skin glisten with his saliva, he liked the sight more than he should have. 

“Zayn. Fuck. Your tattoos are so _hot_.” 

When he reached Zayn’s nipples, he licked one of them and sucked it into his mouth. Zayn shuddered and made a low, keening noise in his throat. 

“Fuck. _Liam_.” 

Upon hearing the way Zayn said his name, Liam’s cock got harder, if that was even possible. He had never been this hard in his life. It was an exhilarating experience. There was lust, desire and passion in that moment. He wanted Zayn and he was certain (and smug) that Zayn wanted him right back. 

“Don’t be a fucking _tease_ , Liam” Zayn growled. 

Liam snickered as Zayn glared at him. “Shh, baby. Patience” was all Liam said. 

He kissed further down Zayn’s body. Zayn had absolutely no chest hair, Liam noticed and this gave him better access to his skin. He kissed every inch of Zayn’s skin within his reach and soothingly licked every hickey that he left. He dropped feather-light kisses on Zayn’s love handles. 

“So beautiful. Perfect” he whispered as he kissed Zayn’s body, while sneaking appreciation and promises into his touches. Finally, he reached Zayn’s cock which was erect and leaking precome. 

Smirking, he pressed a light kiss right on the head and without touching it anymore, he went on and began sucking a hickey on Zayn’s thigh. He wanted Zayn to need him. He wanted Zayn to beg. And, Zayn did just that, 

“Liam, fucking do it already.” 

“What do you want me to do, babe?” Liam asked with faux innocence. 

“I want you to _fuck_ me.” Zayn said, with no shame and insecurity. 

Liam stopped kissing the inside of his thighs, and looked up to see Zayn staring at him intently, with lust-filled eyes, alight with desire. The light from the bedside lamp hit him on the best spots and his face looked even sharper and more defined. His hair was no longer up in a quiff. It was falling ever so lightly on his forehead and his skin shined with sweat. His features were highlighted and he looked like an _angel_. An angel who was Liam’s for the night. And, Liam wanted to make the most of it. 

Liam smiled and looked at Zayn with pure adoration and awe. He kissed Zayn’s forehead and said, while looking straight into his hazel eyes, 

“I won’t fuck you. _I will make love to you_.” 

Zayn’s eyes considerably widened as he saw Liam look at him such fondness. No one had ever said that to him. No one had cared as much as Liam. No one had kissed almost every inch of his skin or praised his tattoos. This was new to him and he loved every second of it. He visibly swallowed the lump in his throat as he gazed at Liam whose eyes, although filled with lust and desire, were overpowered by awe. _Awe._ All his life, no one other than his Ammi had looked at Zayn that way. His Ammi would look at him _pride_ when he’d stand first in the drawing competition, with _fondness_ when he’d teach Waliyah, with _concern_ when he’d have a fall and injure himself, with _love_ when his Abba would shout at him. And then, there was Liam, a complete stranger who he was going to sleep with. He looked at Liam who was frowning and had worry etched into the planes his face. 

“Shit. I’m sorry for fuck, making you uncomfortable. I could like, drop you home. Sorry. I didn’t mean to, um. I wante-” 

“Liam. It’s alright. Yeah? Do whatever you want to. I don’t mind.” 

“Oh. Okay.” 

The smile that graced Liam’s face was breathtaking and Zayn couldn’t breathe. Liam was happy and somehow this made Zayn content. Ignoring the whirlwind of emotions in his mind, he pulled Liam in for a kiss. Liam complied. 

Liam’s hands snaked down to cup Zayn’s arse. He squeezed it as he kissed Zayn with every inch of his being, like his life depended on it. Slowly, he circled the rim of Zayn’s hole. it felt so good to touch Zayn there, _finally._

“ _Liam_! Do it already.” 

Liam reluctantly retreated his hand and searched the bedside-drawers for the bottle of lube and the packet of condoms. He placed the condoms beside Zayn and his entangled bodies and poured a generous amount of lube on his fingers. Slowly, but surely, Liam guided his finger into Zayn’s hole. 

“Fuck, Li” 

The nickname made Liam glow and he diverted his eyes to look at Zayn. Zayn’s eyes were shut and his lips were parted. 

“Ugh. So tight, Zayn.” 

Liam rotated his finger inside Zayn’s hole and in the spur of the moment, he bent forward and kissed Zayn’s forehead. Zayn’s eyes snapped open. His eyes held a question who’s answer Liam, himself didn’t know. 

“Another, Zayn?” Liam asked to avoid an awkward conversation. 

“Fuck. Yes, Li.” 

Gladly, Liam added another finger and with utmost care, he began scissoring Zayn’s hole. 

Zayn couldn’t help but smile slightly as he gazed at the frown and the look of utter concentration on Liam’s face. Liam continued scissoring Zayn’s hole to stretch it and Zayn continued to look at Liam with complete admiration. Suddenly, a ferocious wave of pleasure surged through Zayn’s body. Liam’s fingers had brushed against his prostate and the feeling had been heavenly. 

“Fuck, Li. _That spot_. Again, please, again.” 

Liam craned his fingers and did his best to hit that spot again. Finally, he got it and he continued to brush his fingers against as Zayn went absolutely buts with carnal desire and pure want. He was writhing on the bed and Liam wanted to commit this sight to memory. It was one of the most beautiful things he had ever seen and he was left spellbound. 

“Liam. Liam. Fuck. I’m ready. _Ready_.” 

Liam looked at Zayn with uncertainty and Zayn only nodded his approval. 

Unrushed, Liam pulled his fingers out of Zayn’s hole and while kneeling between Zayn’s legs, grabbed the packet of condoms. He teared it open and tried to get it on. But, because his fingers were slippery, he couldn’t do it. Zayn chuckled and said, “Let me do it,” Blushing, Liam handed the condom over to Zayn who started rolling it on Liam’s length. Zayn’s fingers brushed against Liam’s dick and Liam let out a low moan. He was so hard and he had no friction at all. 

Liam was reaching for the bottle of lube but, Zayn beat him to it. Zayn opened the bottle and after pouring a generous amount on the palm of his hand, he covered Liam’s length with it. 

“Fuck, Zayn.” 

Zayn sensually pumped Liam’s cock as he spread the lube. It was one of the hottest things in the world, Liam though. He knew he would come if Zayn continued his assault. So, asking Zayn to stop, he said, “Lie down, babe. Let me take care of you.” Sparing Liam one last glance, Zayn laid down on his back, with his legs on either side of Liam’s body. They were both panting and they both needed it, desperately. 

In an attempt to make it as good for Zayn as possible, Liam guided his dick very slowly into Zayn’s stretched hole. To tease Zayn, Liam rubbed the head of his dick on Zayn’s entrance a couple to times. 

“Li, _please_.” 

_Who could say no to that?_ Liam mused. 

Very slowly, Liam pushed the head into Zayn’s hole. Zayn let out a sharp hiss of pain and Liam stilled. Zayn’s features were contorted into a look of pain and discomfort ruled his emotions. To distract Zayn from the pain, Liam surged forward and kissed him. Willingly, Zayn opened his mouth and Liam’s tongue sneaked it. After a few seconds of kissing, Zayn relaxed and Liam pushed his dick further into Zayn’s hole. Zayn was unbelievably tight and his 

“Move, Li. Just _move_.” 

After contemplating his course of action for a few seconds, Liam decided to bottom out. So, he pushed in completely and Zayn moaned so loud that Liam was sure his neighbours had heard him. They would be traumatised but Liam couldn’t bring himself to care. He tried his best to not move and give Zayn a chance to adjust. Finally, 

“Okay, I’m okay.” 

Zayn’s voice broke as he said this. His hair was dishevelled and he was panting. (Liam still thought he was beautiful.) 

Liam pulled out slightly and entered Zayn again. Zayn’s thighs trembled and slight ministrations went south through his body. He opened his mouth to moan but no sounds came out. Never in his life, had he felt this way before. Liam and Zayn’s voices joined to form a symphony, a melody like no other. As Liam entered Zayn again and again and again, Zayn’s mind was blank and his senses heightened. He could feel every thrust, see every detail, hear every sound. He was floating away to uncertainty. But, somehow it felt like home. He felt safe and secure in the arms of a stranger, a man he would possibly never meet again. Zayn realised that Liam was different. Liam wasn’t here to fulfil his libido and his wants. He wanted to make it equally good for Zayn and men like that were seldom found. Men who were kind and considerate. Men who were selfless and sacrificing. Men who cared and loved. Liam was one of those men. Zayn knew that he would never forget Liam. He wouldn’t forget him when he would be 30, settled with a good job and the world at his feet. Not when he would be 60, retired and buying books to read over the weekend. Not even he would be 80, old, drinking tea and singing along to YMCA playing on TV. Because, people like Liam weren’t forgotten. They were remembered and memories with them were cherished. 

But, what if Liam forgot him? 

No, Zayn wouldn’t let that happen. He wanted to make this as good as for Liam as it was for him. He wanted to give Liam a time he would never fail to remember. 

So, Zayn said, “Li, stop. Wait.” 

Liam immediately frowned and pulled out. “Fuck. Did you get hurt? I’m so sorr-” 

“No, I’m fine. Just, you know, get up.” 

“Oh! Um, okay” 

Without much pressure, Zayn pushed Liam off him, got up and said, “Relax, Li. Just sit on the bed.” Liam was still frowning but he complied quickly. 

Zayn moved over to Liam and sat down on his lap. Not wasting any time to dry-hump, he got hold of Liam’s length and held it in place. He lifted himself slightly and very slowly guided himself onto Liam’s length. He bottomed out with relatively less pain and let out a high-pitched moan of absolute pleasure. 

“Fuck, Zayn. Wow.” Liam said, voice wavering. 

Zayn smiled shyly and said, “I want to make you feel good.” 

Liam gasped and sudden fondness crept into his heart and into the spaces between his bones and stayed there. 

Zayn noticed that Liam positioned his legs behind Zayn in such a way that they supported Zayn’s weight. It was a simple gesture but it meant a lot to Zayn. When Liam tried to get a hand around Zayn, he shook his head and said in a rapsy voice, “Don’t. Wanna come untouched.” 

Liam could do nothing but gaze at Zayn who was trying his utter best to satisfy Liam. Little did he know that Liam was satisfied only by looking at him. Liam took a moment to truly appreciate Zayn’s tattoos. Liam wanted to know the story behind each of them. Why Zayn had gotten them, what they meant to him, did it hurt too much, where he got them. So many questions flooded Liam’s mind and he was desperate for answers. Zayn intrigued him. He wanted to know what Zayn liked and what he hated, whether he liked to read, whether he preferred tea or coffee, summer or winter, the quiet or a room filled with people, Marvel or DC, black or white, bottles of Grey Goose or a glass of wine, never-ending conversations or shy glances exchanged in silence. 

He wanted to know _Zayn_. 

But, then Liam realised that he did _know_ Zayn, in the most intimate way possible. 

Suddenly, Zayn quivered and his whole body shook. Liam could only stare as Zayn reached his high and came, untouched. He shot spurts of white liquid all over Liam’s chest. As he got through his orgasm, he continued moving with Liam inside him. He never let go. Unlike other people in Liam’s life. 

Finally, Liam swelled and came, feeling on top of the world. His orgasm lasted for several minutes and Zayn rode him through it. It was the best sex of his life, hands down. Zayn whimpered as Liam pulled out carefully from his over-sensitive hole. He removed the condom and knotted it before throwing in the dustbin. 

He kissed Zayn on the forehead and placed him on the bed as he went to the bathroom. Returning with a wet cloth, he wiped the come on his chest and Zayn’s thighs. Leaving the cloth on the bedroom floor with indifference, he climbed into bed. Switching off the lights, he pulled Zayn towards his chest and pressed a chaste kiss to his lips. He pulled the duvet over the mess of limbs and Zayn could only stare as Liam took care of him. 

“Sleep, baby. Good night.” Liam whispered in the darkness of the room. 

“Good night, Li” Zayn whispered back. 

***

**Mumbai; 7th December, 2014; 09:48 pm**

For once in his life, Zayn woke up to warm sheets and a hand curled around his waist. Also, Liam was staring at him with a fond smile. 

“It’s bad to stare, Liam.” 

“Good morning to you, too, Zayn.” Liam said, right back. 

Zayn snickered and shook his head. 

“Why don’t you go and shower? I’ll fix you some breakfast.” 

Zayn smiled and nodded. ****

**~**

After wearing the clothes that Liam had left for Zayn in the bedroom, he walked out of the room and searched for the kitchen. Finally, after opening a few doors and walking around, he found it. 

“Hey, Li. Smells amazing.” 

Liam flinched and remembered that morning when Aiden had said the exact same words. Willing himself to forget about it, he smiled brightly at Zayn and asked him to sit down at the table. ****

**~**

Conversation came easy to both of them. Liam spoke about London while Zayn launched into a lengthy description of Mumbai. Liam voiced his utter disappointment over the English Cricket Team while Zayn, with pride in his voice and mirth in his eyes, confessed his adoration and reverence for the Men in Blue. While Liam had supported Germany this FIFA, Zayn had backed Netherlands. Although their choices in sports differed, they bonded over their love for classic music. Liam justified his love for Bob Dylan as Zayn hummed the tunes of _Like A Rolling Stone_. Zayn told him why he preferred Paul McCartney over John Lennon as Liam told him that _Bohemian Rhapsody_ was the best song he had ever heard. Liam smiled shyly as Zayn snickered and grinned. 

They complimented each other in the most beautiful way ever. 

Two halves making one whole. 

“I’ll leave now, I guess.” 

Liam did his best to hide the disappointed and loneliness surging through his veins. With a curt nod of his head, he got up, collected their plates and dropped them in the sink. Standing with his back turned to Zayn and his hands on the sink, he forced himself to smile through the heaviness in his heart. For some unexplainable reason, he didn’t want Zayn to leave. 

Finally turning, he said, 

“Um. Yeah. How much do I owe you?” 

Different emotions flittered through Zayn’s face and with a small frown, he answered Liam. Grabbing his wallet, he pulled out some notes and handed them over to Zayn. Without bothering to count the money, Zayn pocketed it and started moving towards the door. 

As he watched Zayn put one foot in front of the other, he thought of last night. Not of the sex, but of the small details. That point of time when Zayn’s smirk turned into a smile. When his grabby hands turned into exploring fingers and a shy caress. When his whines turned into pants. When he opened his mouth but no noises came out. When Liam saw heaven through Zayn’s eyes and paradise as he mapped out Zayn’s flawless skin. When he left marks on Zayn’s skin in an attempt to never be forgotten. When Zayn looked at him with a look he couldn’t decipher. When he entered Zayn and realised that there was no place he’d rather be. When he bundled Zayn in his arms later and noticed that he fit him better than his favourite sweater back home. With Zayn in his arms, he felt at home. Even though he was miles away. When he woke up and saw Zayn right next to him, mouth slightly open, quiff forgotten and eyelashes fanning his cheekbones. When he felt inadequate as he looked at Zayn. When his doubts vanished because Zayn was here, in his bed, in his house, in his life. And he couldn’t ask for anything better. Because, sometimes you meet people who make you happy. Happy like a mother on the day she delivers and holds her child in her arms for the first time. Happy like a kid when he gets that gift for Christmas that he’s always wanted. Happy like a student after he gets the degree that he worked so hard for and his dreams start to materialise. Happy as a man when he asks the person he has loved all his life with body, mind and soul to marry him and gets a ‘yes’ in response. With Zayn, Liam had felt invincible. Like, he could gain the world and conquer his demons. 

And, he simply couldn’t let Zayn go. 

So, he dashed out of his flat like Hugh Grant. He was scared to his fucking limits and goose-bumps marred his skin. His mind went blank as his feet carried him forward. He descended the stairs, too impatient to wait for the elevator and stopped only outside his building. He looked left and right, searching for Zayn. A glimpse of that leather jacket, a whiff of that cologne. All he could see was people rushing on the streets and cars speeding by. He felt defeated. His shoulders slumped and his eyes were downcast. He had one chance and he didn’t seize the opportunity. He could hear those bullies in High School, chanting ‘Coward. Fucking coward.’ 

Shaking his head to clear his thoughts, he breathed a sigh, looked up and began walking towards the building. 

But, then, 

“Liam!” 

Zayn’s voice pierced through the street, through the dozens of people and millions of sounds, through Liam’s self-doubt and low confidence. He turned towards the sound only to see Zayn running towards him. He smiled. He smiled like he never had before because this was his rain in the desert, his piece of land amidst stormy seas, his little piece of heaven. 

_A drop in the ocean_

_A change in the weather_

_I was praying that you and me might end up together_

Zayn stopped in front of Liam as his breath came out in pants. 

“Hey, Li.” 

Liam sighed. “Hi.” 

“I. Uh. I mean, I was go-” 

Liam silenced him with his lips. 

_Settle down with me_

_Cover me up, cuddle me in_

_Lie down with me_

_And hold me in your arms_

As he kissed Zayn, he realised how much he wanted this; needed this. While last night’s kiss was more about attraction, this was adoration. Because, lust was Friday night; love was Saturday morning. Liam didn’t remember much about that kiss. He failed to realise when he pried Zayn’s lips apart and licked into his mouth or when Zayn bit Liam’s lip and drew out a moan. All he remembered were his feelings; feelings that he could neither explain nor decipher, feelings that he would never find words for; he would learn to name those feelings after the one who gave them to him. He would name them as Zayn. 

Whatever Zayn did was perfect and better than anything Liam could have asked for. He placed a hand behind Liam’s neck as he kissed him with fervour; pulled him back by the waist when Liam stopped kissing him; maintained a steady hand on Liam’s back as he offered Liam everything that Liam had never imagined would be his. 

When they finally pulled back, Liam said, 

“Wow, Zayn. That was- 

“Amazing. Yeah?” 

“Better than that, y’know?” 

Zayn smiled in response, all soft edges and shy glances. Liam could only stare. Before he could stop himself, he asked- 

“Zayn, um, not to sound harsh but, like, do you do this everyday?” 

“Yeah. I mean, no. Every Friday. Why?” 

“I’ll be there.” 

***

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading it! Do tell me what you think :D  
> Also, if ya'll could pleasure tell me your countries of origin, I've always wanted to know. It helps me picture you. Pretty please!  
> And, if you could tell me your favorite part of the chapter, I'd be forever indebted.  
> Love you to the moon and back!


	3. Wonderwall

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry. I know it's been too long. No excuse I give will be sufficient. Just. Sorry!
> 
> The 3rd chapter is comparatively shorter but also comparatively tougher to write. It's a glimpse into Zayn's mind and I hope you like it :-D
> 
> Lots of love,  
>  Winona.

*******

**Mumbai; 12th December, 2014; 21:55 pm**

  
_And all the roads we have to walk are winding_

_And all the lights that lead us there are blinding_

_There are many things that I_

_Would like to say to you but I don't know how_

_Because maybe, you're gonna be the one that saves me_

_And after all, you're my wonderwall_

_I’ll be there._

Liam’s words played through Zayn’s head. He had promised him that he would be there. That he would smile stupidly at Zayn like his world started and ended with him. That he would stare at Zayn like he was something extraordinary and he couldn’t believe that he was going to sleep with him. That he would slowly peel off every piece of clothing on Zayn’s skin and stare at his body for what would feel like aeons. That he would kiss every inch of Zayn’s skin and moan his name like it was a prayer, an absolution. That he would drape his hands around Zayn’s body, protecting him from the world, from the demons within. That he would ravish Zayn, adore Zayn, _love Zayn._ Love him like no one ever had before. 

All his life, Zayn had believed that he wasn’t good enough. He wasn’t up to the mark. He wasn’t what his Abba wanted as a son. He was worthless, useless, a waste of time, money and space. During High School, he wasn’t the person his classmates wanted him to be. He didn’t fit in their moulds. The way he walked and acted left a bitter taste in their mouths. The words he spoke weren’t what they wanted to listen to. They always chose others over him because he was weird, his jokes were awkward, his clothes were baggy and his choices were repulsive. He was the backup plan, the second choice; never good enough to be the first. All High School left him with, was chewed nails, hunched shoulders, sometimes slit wrists and cold, lifeless eyes. Somewhere along the way, he learnt to speak only when required, to walk with his head down and to cover his scars with his Ammi’s makeup. 

Another thing he learnt was smoking. 

~

_Zayn was 18 when he smoked his first cigarette._

_It had been a week since he had arrived at University. He was sitting in his room, books spread out on his study table, trying to tackle Physics, as his roommate, some guy called Vicky, smoked away to oblivion. Smoking was prohibited on the premises but since they were no security cameras inside the dorm rooms, the students were safe._

_Physics had never been Zayn’s forte. He absolutely loathed it. Hated the numericals he could never solve and the laws he could never understand. When he didn’t get the sum for the fifth time in a row, he threw his pencil across the room, got up, walked towards his bed and fell face-first into it. He groaned and thought about what a failure he was._

_“You look stressed, man. Want a smoke?”_

_Slowly, Zayn looked up and peered at his roommate. This was the first time he had even bothered to talk to Zayn. Shrugging, he stood up, thoughts of religion and his family abandoned, and walked towards Vicky’s bed. When he was close enough, Vicky handed over the cigarette and Zayn held it in his long, nimble fingers._

_This was the moment he would always remember. When he took his first drag, when the smoke entered his mouth and then moved to his throat, burning the skin it touched. He took the cigarette away from his lips and held the smoke in for some time. He didn’t cough or gag or regret his decision. Finally, he let the smoke out and watched it swirl as it mixed in the air. After some time, he could no longer see the white fumes and the mouth felt like he had inhaled fire. But, he liked it. Because, when the smoke left his mouth, it took the pain away. The sorrow, the anguish, the imperfections._

_At around 2 that night, Vicky said something that Zayn would always remember,_

_“We are all addicted to something that takes the pain away.”_

~

_As days passed, Zayn continued smoking. Not alone, but with Vicky._

_Once they sneaked up to the terrace. Vicky had stolen the keys from one of the peons and asked Zayn if he wanted to come. Zayn knew that they might get caught but he wanted to be reckless, a rebel. He wanted to be James Dean for that night._

_So, he went with Vicky, climbed the stairs, pushed open the door to the terrace, sat down in the company of the stars and smoked. They both had a penchant for Marlboro Reds and as they emptied packet after packet and the air started reeking of cigarette smoke, Zayn continued looking up at the sky. Suddenly, he saw a bright light as it dashed across the sky. His eyes grew wide as he realised that it was a shooting star._

_“Vicky! Vicky, look. Shooting star.”_

_“Yeah.” , Vicky said as he stared at the sky, thoroughly mesmerised and awed. Zayn looked at him and realised that the way the moonlight hit Vicky’s face was simply breathtaking and so, so beautiful._

_Then Vicky said, “You know, someone once told me that shooting stars are really just angels throwing away their cigarettes before God can catch them smoking.”_

_Vicky turned his head to look at Zayn, smiling softly._

_And Zayn kissed him._

~

_Vicky agreed to date Zayn on one condition; it would be a secret._

_Zayn agreed. Something was better than nothing. Vicky was the first guy who had shown interest in Zayn and he was jubilant. Zayn could deal with the fact that Vicky wasn’t out of the closet. It’s not a big deal, Zayn told himself._

_So, Zayn and Vicky never went out on dates, Zayn didn’t go to Vicky’s cricket games or kiss him in public. The night Vicky took Zayn’s virginity, there was no soft, romantic music playing in the background or rose petals on the bed, like those Hindi movies. They fucked in their dorm room and never let the news go beyond the room’s walls._

_It’s okay, Zayn told himself. He didn’t deserve that kind of special treatment, anyway._

_Days came and days went._

_When Vicky told Zayn that his friends from the Cricket Team had set him up with some girl, Zayn told him that he didn’t mind Vicky going out with her. Because, at the end of the day, he was dating Zayn, right?_

_Not right._

_Less than a week later, Zayn found Vicky making out with that very girl in the corridors._

_That day, he purchased three packets of Marlboro Reds and requested for a dorm-transfer._

~

_I was your cure_

_And you were my disease._

_I was saving you_

_But, you were killing me._

~

Ever since that day, Zayn had been drowning. 

And no one was there to save him. 

But, when he saw Liam, hope flickered. Because, Zayn knew that Liam could save him. Hold his hand and never let go. Help him fight his battles, his demons. Keep him safe in his arms and promise security with his kisses. 

Promise him that he’ll be there. 

But he wasn’t. 

He wasn’t there. 

Just like all the other people in Zayn’s life. 

_Here comes the rain again, falling from the stars_

_Drenched in my pain again, becoming who we are_

_As my memory rests, but never forgets what I lost_

And although people had left him and betrayed his trust, Zayn’s experiences made him stronger. He didn’t care anymore about those people, people who broke the promises that they made to him. So, when Liam didn’t turn up that night, Zayn decided that he was going home with someone else. Someone who wasn’t Liam and soft cheeks and brown eyes. Someone who would fuck him hard and fast and not make love to him like Liam had. Some who would not bother, not care, not _love._

Because, all love caused was pain. 

Pain. 

Pain. 

_Pain._

~

Zayn got into the next car that stopped in front of him. The man looked to be around 30 and was dressed in a suit. His hair was neatly combed as compared to Liam’s small brown quiff. He smirked at Zayn and Zayn thought of Liam’s smile. Throughout the car ride, he asked Zayn questions about himself that he was compelled to answer. 

He drove them to a hotel with a cold, unfamiliar room instead of a cosy and lived-in house like Liam’s. 

As he started undressing Zayn with rough hands and impatient fingers, all Zayn could think about was Liam’s soft fingertips and shy touches. 

Liam. 

Liam. 

_Liam._

*******

**Mumbai; 12th December, 2014; 22:15 pm**

“Fuck. Fuck. _Fuck_ ” 

It was as if Liam’s vocabulary had been reduced to one word; fuck. 

All Liam could think about was hazel eyes, scattered stubble, black jackets, Lee Cooper shirts, golden highlights in black hair, tanned skin, soft moans, beautiful whimpers, secure arms and a warm heart. 

All Liam could think about was Zayn. 

Zayn. 

Zayn. 

_Zayn._

All he thought about was Zayn as he drove his car at the highest permitted speed on the highway. Racing towards Zayn while praying, hoping, wishing that he was still there. 

*******

**Mumbai; 12th December, 2014; 22:24 pm**

He couldn’t find him. 

Liam had looked for so much time, had circled the road almost thrice, on foot. He had desperately checked every face, looked behind every tree but he couldn’t find him. 

He couldn’t fucking find Zayn. 

He had lost the one man he wanted. 

Simply because his boss had convened a last minute meeting to discuss the work that still needed to be done. Simply because he attended a fucking meeting that he should’ve missed. 

Stupid. 

Stupid. 

_Stupid Liam._

Liam’s breath came out in pants. His chest heaved and ached with every breath he took. 

Then, he saw that boy. 

That boy whom he had seen on the day he met Zayn. The one with curly hair and lanky legs who didn’t look like an Indian. It felt like centuries had passed since that day. It felt like the sun had risen and the sun had set, wars had been fought and wars had been won. It was as if ages had gone by in the blink of an eye. With Zayn, time was immaterial, unnecessary. 

For some unknown reason, Liam walked towards that boy. He had to know where Zayn was. He had to know. And, if to know he would have to talk to strangers, then so be it. 

Liam stopped right in front of the boy and the boy looked up from his phone to stare at Liam. Liam only stared back. He didn’t know what to say. The boy raised an eyebrow and smirked, revealing his dimple. 

“Yeah, man?” 

Liam realised that his accent wasn’t Indian. It sounded....British. if it was an ordinary day, he would’ve inquired about it. But, right know all he wanted and needed to know about was Zayn. 

“Um. I wanted to like, yeah. I mean, you know, like, that guy, who, um, stands there, near that tree. He’s a little shorter than me. And, um, he’s got this, you know, blond highlight in his hair. He’s handsome. Like, very handsome.” 

The curly-haired boy only smirked and said, 

“He is handsome. Like, too handsome.” 

“So, you, like, know him?” 

“Yup. I know Zayn.” 

“Wow. Okay. I’m sure this sounds shit creepy but, like, you have any idea where he is. Like.” 

“Oh! Yeah. I mean, I don’t exactly know where he is. But, I saw him getting into some guy’s car and driving towards the town at around 9. Why are you asking, anyway?” 

Liam didn’t reply. 

He couldn’t reply. 

He only walked towards his car, got in, turned on the ignition and started driving home. 

For the first time in years, he felt broken. 

Like, he was no longer human. 

He was just pieces. 

Pieces of what he once was. 

~

_I'll be there for you_

_These five words I swear to you_

_When you breathe I want to be the air for you_

_I'll be there for you_

_I'd live and I'd die for you_

_I'd steal the sun from the sky for you_

_Words can't say what a love can do_

_I'll be there for you_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading.
> 
> Lyric credits will be put up shortly. Do tell me what you think. Your comments are my aphrodisiac.


	4. Half A Heart

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, my little balls of sunshine!  
> *waits for everyone to throw tomatoes and rotten eggs at her*  
> I'm so fucking sorry for making y'all wait. I've been a bitch. Feel free to curse me.  
> I'm not going to say anything in my defense because no excuse is sufficient.  
> Moving on, *cue the drum roll* CHAPTER 4 IS HERE!  
> But, there's a catch! Instead of 4 chapters as promised, there's going to be 5 chapters!  
> So, 4 down, 1 to go.  
> Hope y'all like this chapter.  
> Love and cupcakes,  
> Winona 
> 
> _Title taken from One Direction's song of the same name._
> 
> Dedicated to [ starkziam ](archiveofourown.org/users/starkziam/pseuds/starkziam) because...  
> You're my backbone.  
> You're my cornerstone  
> You're my crutch when my legs stop moving.  
> I love you, Vashu. Without you, this wouldn't have been possible. Thank you for being there when I was living under textbooks. You're an angel.

**Monday; 12th December, 2014; 23:46 pm**  
Zayn stared at the room around him. He could hear the sound of water gushing from the tap in the bathroom. The man who had hired him for the night wanted to use the loo or something. Zayn wasn't really paying attention to what the man said.  


All he could think of was Liam.  
Liam.  
Liam.  
_Liam_  


_Empty spaces fill me up with holes._  
_Distant faces with no place left to go._  
_Without you within me, I can't find no rest_

With Liam, Zayn had felt loved for once in his life. He'd had someone's adoration for one night. But, that love and adoration had been taken away from him. He'd has a taste of it and it had been snatched away. He'd had a sip of an elixir only to never have that privilege again. 

Zayn's life was like the night, dark and endless. And Liam was a ray of light, all hope and radiance. He had entered Zayn's life like a shooting star, flying across the expanse of his soul, soothing every part he touched, healing every wound he came across and then, finally, going away. He'd had a glimpse of that shooting star, a glance through heaven, only to never see it again. 

He was trying to forget Liam but at the same time, me was waiting for him to come back.

_I tried to go on like I never knew you_  
_I'm awake but my world I half asleep_  
_I pray for this heart to be unbroken_  
_But, without you all I'm going to be is, incomplete._  


He felt incomplete without Liam. Like a part of him was missing. 

_And being here without you, is like waking up to_  
_Only half a blue sky, kinds there but not quite_  
_I'm walking around with just one shoe,_  
_I'm half a heart without you._   


He needed Liam back. He need the boy who had kissed him like he meant it, who had held his hand and whispered promises in his ears, who had treated him like he was a piece of art, who had loved him, who had _completed_ him 

_I know,_  
_You love me_  
_You complete me_  
_You hold my heart in your hands in your hands_  
_And it's okay 'cause, I trust that_  
_You'll be the best man that you can_  


**~**

Half an hour later, Zayn found himself outside Liam's door, his heart beating fast and anticipation ruling his senses. Saying a silent prayer, his hand inched towards the doorbell. 

But, then, suddenly... 

TBC

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As Sulphur pointed out, I had promised that there won't be any more cliffhangers but I couldn't help it. I'm sorry <3  
> Chapter 5 will be up soon.  
> What do y'all think is going to happen? Feel free to go wild with your imaginations as you comment!  
> Love,  
> Winona  
> P.S. Am I the only who's happy about Zerrie breaking up?


End file.
